Why Do We Find it So Hard to Take Care of Ourselves?

whay do we find it so hard to take care of ourselves

What you would do if you walked into a room and a baby was crying with distress alone in its crib?

Your VERY NATURAL response is going to be:

- Pick the baby up and snuggle it close
- Use your voice to soothe and calm
- Cuddle / rock / sway / change movements to settle
- Respond to actual physical needs - hunger, thirst, nappy change
- If it’s in an environment which could be uncomfy (too loud, hot, cold, exposed) move to somewhere new
- Take baby to their mum/dad/familiar caretaker

What you WOULD NOT do is:
- Ask that baby to earn your care
- Tell the baby to get over itself
- Ask the baby to look after you instead
- Get angry or upset that the baby needed care
- Expect the baby to wait

Why then do we withhold the same level of love + acceptance + self care from ourselves?

I often have convos with women who are on the cusp of prioritising their own self care, and there are themes in the surface objections why this is not available / possible / ok to do.

Here's the top ten reasons I hear:

1. numbing - so busy numbing I don't know what my needs are
2. conditioning - I don't feel right taking care of myself
3. identity - I am the caretaker, not the care receiver
4. boundaries - I don't know when to stop DOing, and start BEing
5. no reference point - of a woman taking care of herself
6. self worth issues - I don't deserve to feel good
7. feels selfish - putting myself first doesn't feel right
8. feeling like you have to earn it - and that "earning" list just never gets done
9. no bandwidth - don't have the resources to work out wth I need, and
10. it just feels safer to do what I always have!

All very “sensible” objections.
But what if I told you the very way to

❤️ unravel old hurts
❤️ let go of stuff that isn’t yours anymore
❤️ ride the waves of this discombobulating peri rollercoaster with more ease
❤️ take care of your own needs as readily as you would that that baby's needs.

🧚‍♂️ Have the courage to turn inwards.
🥰 To connect to your heart.
😊 To gently ask your soul “how can I honour your right now?”.

If not before, midlife is the perfect time to learn to listen and respond to your own needs:

Need helping listening and responding to your needs in this messy and magical midlife?

Start here👇

menoPAUSE Self Care Resources including meditations, yoga nidra and my Midlife Mojo course here.

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